Court von Court: Possessed People’s Court

This is the future of daytime court television programming. It’s evil and just dumb enough to appeal to the daytime audiences that are most likely hopped up/ plopped down on a cocktail of daytime pills.

The presiding judge is Count von Count.

The defendants on the show are folks accused by their neighbors, co-workers, friends, or family of being a servant of Satan (i.e. “possessed”). Occasionally, animals would be prosecuted as well.

If the defendant is pronounced guilty, s/he will be immediately sentenced. Then The Count would count the years of the sentence one by one with that awesome Roma music playing in the background; occasionally he would turn to the camera and give us a deep maniacal laugh (depending on the sentence, this could be a huge portion of the show… just see how long it takes to count to 180).

Once the sentence has been counted out in its entirety, the defendant would be released and have to go through an obstacle course while being chased by an angry mob equipped with torches, rakes, shovels, and spiked clubs. The guilty would be given a 30-second head start.

Slayer or Iron Maiden or a cover band of either would be the show’s official band. 90% of the people on the show would be guilty. The prosecutor would be the accuser, and if they are wrong in their accusation, they will be sentenced. That’s The Count’s rules.

[tags]marc horowitz countvoncount count court tv daytime television slayer iron maiden satan judge possessed[/tags]