Ideas

+++ Here are some ideas I’ve had over the years. I occasionally update it. Some are pretty bad and that gives you the right to punch me when you see me.

Time Traveling Zombie movie!

Run in place in a wind tunnel in really over-sized clothing.

Water ski entirely wrapped in bacon.

Make a rotating restaurant out of bullet proof glass and put it in the middle of a gun range. Get shot out while you eat, and never get hurt.

Make a reality TV show with three sniper roommates.

Run for the CEO of a company you select – pass out buttons and propaganda, really attempt to become the CEO. Would it work?

Drive across the entire US with your feet hanging out the window. Start your journey wearing a pair of fresh, clean, white socks. What will they look like when the trip is over?

Attempt to make a painting of a live nude model in the back of a pickup truck as it is going up a really rough road

Try to eat a five-course meal hanging up side down at a restaurant.

Make wooden car rims for your car.

Actually carry out the making of The DIY Helicopter

Take photos of people’s keychains and make a book of it.

Take a series of photos of you sneezing milk on someone else.

Make several short videos of you yelling at inanimate objects.

Hire a stenographer to follow you around for a day, documenting everything you say in a 24 hour period – make and publish a book of it. I’m sure this would be horribly boring. Sorry.

Make Fortune Cookie Cereal. Print different words on each cookie so you could make your own fortunes. See if you can sell a grocery store on stocking a few boxes.

Move your office permanently into your vehicle. Make your vehicle green at the same time by installing some sod (if you have a truck).

Encase a 1969 Camaro SS in a block of lucite and display it as a public sculpture in front of a corporate building.

Music for Football:
I would like to make a musical composition using two opposing football teams. I would outfit each player, 11 per team, with with bright pink dots, one on each of their shoulder pads and the other on top of their helmet. Each dot would represent a musical note, middle C would be on the center’s helmet and the other note placements would be determined from there.

I would have a film camera directly above the line of scrimmage, and I would film several downs. Later I would look at each freeze frame and determine when each of the pink dots where “hit.” Every “hit” would signify a “hit” of that note on an instrument, most likely a piano. I would compile all of the “hits” and their corresponding notes on a timeline. I would then create a score for each down, and play it.

Depending on the down, the piece could last 4 seconds or 20 seconds. It would most likely sound cacophonous in the beginning that get more sparce and minimal as the down continues.

Take a month-long cross country trip inside of a modular home that would travel from LA to the NYC. Once the house arrives at it’s destination, turn it into a performance space, or shoot a zombie movie in it.

Biothermal Powered concerts, cars, coffee?:
Pack a room full of people so tight that it heats up a great deal , enough to where all of this body heat could be converted into electricity via “biothermal batteries” or “thermoelectric batteries”; this energy could power the charge on an electric vehicle, run a coffee maker, power a movie show, power a concert… This could serve as a small model for subway systems and buses, where body heat from the passengers could actually go toward the powering of the vehicle. Possible…sure, why not?

For more info on “biothermal batteries”, see the BBC News clip.

Re-organize the Art Institute of Chicago’s art collection alphabetically:
Propose to the Art Institute of Chicago a re-organization of their collection. A web-based portrayal of this would work as well. Start at one end of the museum with A (using artists last names, origin or titles as a reference system) and end at the other end with Z. You’d have early conceptual work right up against textiles and medieval armor. It would make for a very interesting showcase of history revisited.

The Receipt Machine:
This is an invention that would automatically scan your receipt at the point of purchase and send the image/ information to a personal online receipt account. You could keep track of all of your purchases and if you ever needed to return something you would always have your receipt. This could all be done through a magnetic receipt card (like a credit card).

Play various sports on the extremely small plots of grass you find around the city.

Fill a rental car with packing peanuts when you return it.

Document all of the things you open in a day.

Compile a video of hundreds of people sniffing their own hands.

Run a full marathon in your home or office.

Design a lottery for a Billboard. People would have the chance to put up any image they wanted on a highly visible billboard.

Organize a Cruise Strip in your neighborhood.

Stage a Fictitious Mayoral Campaign and His/ Her Assassination.

Make the “Hunt for your Own Food Grocery Store”
You’re given either a crossbow, rifle, shotgun, knife, or handgun to go and hunt for your own food. Some is prepackaged, some is not.

The Home Museum:
Turn someone’s home into a temporary museum. Have them leave their house just the way it is, clean or not. Then, remove all of the doors and cover all of their doorways with plexiglass. Create signage for each room pointing out several banal details. For example, in the bedroom, put a sign near the clothes on the floor pointing out that “This t-shirt was worn by homeowner on March 23, 2005 and lies here unwashed. It is his/her favorite t-shirt and was purchased from a flea market in Western Arizona several years ago.” In the kitchen, there could be a sign reading,”This kitchen was remodeled in 1984, and since then has been cleaned at least once a week.”

You could give guided tours or offer an audio guide. Here is an example room, though it is not as messy as I’d like it to be.